Almost two years after filing, Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom officially signed papers to finalize their divorce in July. But now it seems that divorce might be cancelled.
Divorce Cancelled
Though the reality TV star and basketball player have been working towards divorce for the past few years, it seems that it might be a happy ending for the two. Albeit, one that is not without drama. At the beginning of October, Odom was found unconscious in a Nevada brothel and immediately transported to a local hospital. Kardashian flew to be at his side. Just recently Kardashian’s lawyer, Laura Wasser, asked a judge to withdraw the filed divorce papers.
Because it takes a minimum of 6 months for a divorce to be finalized in California, the two are still technically married. And only time will tell if the couple decides to stay that way.
Bittersweet Divorce
In a recent interview with Complex magazine, Kardashian, 31, expressed that Odom, 35, is “going to always be that person,” a sentiment shared by others that have been through the same experience of divorce. It’s not always easy moving on after divorce, and each person has their own unique experience.
The divorce between the reality TV star and the former professional basketball player has been in the tabloids for years now. While it seemed as if the two were leading a charmed life in front of the cameras on their hit TV show, Khloe and Lamar, the relationship crumbled when the basketball player relapsed into his substance abuse problem.
Kardahsian filed for divorce on September 13, 2013. Odom could not be located to sign the papers.
In Life&Style magazine’s September issue it was reported that the couple had received notice from The Superior Court of California County “alerting both Lamar and Khloe that their divorce is not complete — and once again, she didn’t respond.”
As of April of this year, it was still unclear what was happening between the two. It seemed as if Odom could not be located and Kardashian had still not moved to get a default divorce judgement, despite the fact that she was able to.
A default divorce judgement can be granted if the respondent does not file his or her response within 30 days of receiving the divorce petition. The petitioner can obtain a “default” divorce by filing court forms for judgment, child custody, child support, spousal support, and property division. No trial is necessary.
Still it seems that Kardashian did not want to move forward.
Divorce by Publication
When a spouse cannot be found, you are able to pursue a divorce by publication. To do so, you will need to prove to the court that you have searched for your missing or hiding spouse through a number of means. You will have to file a signed Affidavit of Diligent Search that proves you have exhausted your search, and the spouse can absolutely not be found.
Publication of Summons
After submitting the Affidavit of Diligent Search you will file an Ex Parte (Without Notice) Application for Publication of Summons; Declaration of Petitioner in Support Thereof; Memorandum of Points and Authorities. Once a court approves these it will issue an Order of Publication. This allows the summons to be published once a week for four successive weeks, with at least 5 days between successive publications.
Failure to Respond
The missing spouse has 30 days to file his or her response response, but if they fail to a Petitioner then files a Request to Enter Default Dissolution of Marriage. There is no final hearing and the divorce will proceed and be finalized six months after the first publication of the summons. While the court can grant the divorce, it is not able to legally make decisions regarding child custody, child support, or division of property.
Khloe Opens Up
Kardashian sat down with Complex magazine for their 2015 August/September issue to not only show off her well-trained body in an exercise-themed photoshoot, but also to speak to what had been happening between her and Lamar at that time.
“I talk to Lamar as often as I can, which is inconsistent, but not on my terms,” she said. “When you genuinely feel like that was the right relationship, you’re supposed to give it all you can. That’s what marriage is about. It’s not, ‘Let’s see if it works, if not we always have divorce.’ I am not one of those girls. You took a vow before God and you’re supposed to abide by that.”
While divorce papers were finally signed on July 21 of this year, Kardashian said she hadn’t been “rushing” the divorce because she wasn’t “looking to get married tomorrow.”
“Lamar is genuinely one of the best people I’ve ever met, and everyone says that when they meet him. I think Lamar’s going to always be that person [for me] but that’s what made it so special,” she said. “Even if I had it for five years or whatever, it was the best ever and I’m grateful I did. Some people don’t get that ever and I had that magic for a long time.”
She misses Odom “every day,” she went on to say.
“I miss what we had – things we got to do together are just memories. I like looking back and holding on to that stuff,” she said. “I definitely miss it, and there’s times I’ll get so sentimental and so sad, but this had to happen for some reason. I’ll figure it out over time, someone will give me that answer eventually.”
Moving On
Moving forward after divorce means that every day you will need to actively work to progress and improve . As Professor Harold Hill once said: “You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays.” It’s time to take your life back into your own hands.
Big changes can be accomplished with small steps, like these:
- Wake up
- Get in the zone
- Get moving
- Eat well
- Get inspired
- Gain some perspective
- Do something that will propel you forward
Get Some Sleep and Wake Up in the AM
According to the National Sleep Foundation (NSF) 40 million Americans suffer from over 70 different sleep disorders. Additionally, 60 percent of adults and 69 percent of children have one or more sleep problems at least a few nights during a week.
Getting the right amount of sleep can help you have a longer life, increased creativity, memory, attention, and focus. It can help to lower stress and your risk for depression.
Bottom line: you need your beauty sleep.
Find Clarity
Focus on the positive things in your life. What you set your focus on expands. After waking up from a restful night’s sleep, prayer and meditation can help orient you toward the positive.
Focus on what you are grateful for: being out of a marriage that did not serve you. There are limitless opportunities and possibilities for you every day, so start the morning off by getting yourself into a space of gratitude and clarity.
Physical Activity
By now we all know we need exercise. Still, according to the Center for Disease Control’s National Health Interview Survey, only one-third of American men and women between the ages of 25 to 64 engage in regular physical activity.
Regular exercise has shown to decrease your chance of depression, anxiety, and stress. It’s also been linked to higher success in people’s careers. Any form of exercise works: the gym, yard work, cleaning. Just get your body moving and every aspect of your life will thrive.
Take a Step Forward
Do the important things first. As you work through the day you’ll find your ability to make high quality decisions becomes fatigued. So if you don’t do the important things first, they simply will not get done. That means if you have to contact your ex-spouse for any reason – to discuss an issue with your children, or to ask if they can switch a day of child care next week, get it done first.
When it comes to personal things, the same is true. There will always be a million reasons to put something off til tomorrow. And tomorrow means never.
Consider this mantra: The worst comes first. Do what you’ve been needing to do first. And then do it again the next day.
Every day you need to take a step towards your goals. With every new step, you’ll realize that your goals aren’t that far away.
Moving Forward
A divorce can shatter your life if you let it. So don’t let it.
Every day you can move forward with these steps. Put a plan in place to succeed. Every step on that plan brings you closer to your dreams. Maybe that means finally having a day where you don’t feel guilty or sad about your divorce. Maybe it’s a day of less resentment. Maybe it’s a day where you focus on getting healthy by preparing a good meal for yourself.
Making small steps every day like the ones outlined above will change your life.
A Family Law Attorney
But when it comes to the actual legal process of a divorce, you’ll want to work with a skilled family law attorney There are a number of things that need to be considered during a divorce: child support, spousal support, marital property division, and other things. Working with a skilled attorney can help ensure you get a fair case. For advice on divorce, child custody determinations, setting up a co-parenting agreement, dividing marital property, and spousal support you need the expert law firm of Divorce Law LA. Schedule a consultation today.
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